Cretaceous Copulation and Primate Promiscuity

Ah, it has been a long time since I’ve had occasion to write a post. I’m still plugging away on the fun but time-consuming 125-year-old house remodel – almost done with the interior, and it’s rented beginning in March. We’re already well into 2016, yet I feel like the year has barely begun. There are so many projects piling up that I want to get to. One is getting back to the blog. So many serious and important matters to attend to. But first there’s this:

Jason Dunlop/MfN Berlin

Jason Dunlop/MfN Berlin

Coitus Interruptus on Cretaceous Copulation
Harvestmen, colloquially called daddy longlegs, normally keep their penises tucked inside, a bane for arachnologists, who use penises to help identify harvestmen species. But 99 million years ago, some harvestmen were about to do the nasty when a dollop of sap produced a permanent cockblock, perfectly preserving the perpetrator’s penis in perpetuity. Based partially on this dude’s junk, researchers have placed these harvestmen in a new, extinct family. And now we have a dual meaning for the term daddy longlegs.

Primate Promiscuity
Modern humans evolved about 200,000 years ago and occasionally got busy doing it with other hominins, who were busy doing it with other hominins. Which makes our whole human lineage fairly complicated. Europeans and Asians have about 1-3% neanderthal genes, from hooking up about 50,000-65,000 years ago. Some Neanderthals, though, had also hooked up with a group of modern humans that left Africa 100,000 years ago and later died out. To complicate matters further, another group of archaic humans, the Denisovans, were hooking up with modern humans, Neanderthals, and even Homo erectus. With newer, faster DNA-sequencing techniques, the muddy, braided stream that is modern human evolution will become clearer and clearer.

Primate Proficiency
I used to be a decent dart player. In the early days of dating my now-wife, we would hit the bars on State Street in Madison and occasionally destroy some overconfident frat boys at cricket. When I was in the zone, I could aim for the individual hole at the center of the double bullseye – not that I would always hit it, but I did manage to pull out a six-bull round every so often. When I was focused, the bullseye became a bigger target. As it turns out, I was probably perceiving the bullseye as bigger than it was. A series of studies has shown that how we perceive the world is affected by our physical traits and abilities. So a softball seems bigger to a good hitter, a field goal seems smaller to a crappy kicker, wearing a heavy backpack makes hills seem steeper, and distances seem farther to obese people. Evolutionarily, you can see why seeing a bigger target would be a good trait. Now, if I could only make that golf hole look like the size of a dinner plate.

 

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